Mar 23, 2011

Unemployment diaries



Scene:

A tiny apartment in a tiny village of America

Characters:

Rabina, Niki, Lali, Sewa, Koili. All are young women at various stages of unemployment. Some are recently unemployed, some will soon be unemployed, and some have been unemployed for a long time.

Above mentioned motley crew tumbles into the apartment, all shaking off snow from their jackets.

Sewa: Yay, that was a great time out on the snow!

Koili (grumpy): Great time indeed, as long as we can come home, and what if we are not able to pay the rent, and have to live out in the snow! We need to do something about unemployment, let’s have a meeting!!

Lali (running to the kitchen): I am hungry…..

Sewa (staggering to bed): I am so exhausted, I am going to collapse right here….

Niki (slowly inching towards her laptop): I haven’t watched a single movie today, I should fill the quota….

Koili: NO, WE WILL HAVE A MEETING, NOW!!!

Rabina: All right, calm down, I will round up the girls! (drags everyone to the center of the living room)

Koili: Ok girls, I have made an agenda, let us start with the first thing here, what is your motto in life?

Rabina: Cooking…

Koili: I mean motto for ever, not for evening.

Rabina: Get a job, send money home.

Koili: Mine is the same, and get married.

Niki: Mine is the same too. And I want to make my heart strong.

Sewa: What for? Marriage?

Nikki: Eww, no, for unemployment silly!

Sewa: But you agreed with Koili about marriage! Didn’t she, Lali?

Lali (vaguely): who knows? I stopped keeping track of too many mottos, I only want to bring my mom here.

Koili: You are right Lali, we list too many things, but do nothing, if we started on one thing at a time, that would be one thing less on our list each day.

Lali (unfocused eyes): Can you say that in Nepali please?

Koili: Phew! Never mind, we don’t know how to fulfill our life’s motto, so it will be discussed in the next meeting! Let us move to number two. How are we spending our time?

Lali: Eating too much.

Rabina: wasting time.

Niki: I agree.

Koili: We need to cut off everything that waste our time, like movies, facebook and games.

Lali: I don’t need to cut off anything, coz I only procrastinate!

Koili: Agenda number three- enough of this procrastination and time waste.

Sewa: Come on, its vacation time! Besides, I am sure there is no such thing on the agenda, you just made it up …

Koili: Fine then, had enough of this vacation!

Nikki: Enough enough enough!

Rabina: More than enough!

Koili: Too much talk, Let us make some decisions and start working on it.

Sewa: I need to apply for jobs, but keep forgetting.

Koili: You have an alarm to remind you of brushing your teeth, why can’t you have an alarm for applying to jobs?

Lali: We need to make time tables and schedule tasks so that I don’t procrastinate and you don’t forget.

Everyone starts making timetables.

Nikki: What time should I put my daily movie do you think?

Sewa: Huh? Daily movie?

Koili: Let’s put it just before bed time Nikki. You know I can’t sleep without watching a movie, so that would be the best time for us to watch together!

Sewa: I never knew you girls watched a movie every day. Do you watch it after I go to sleep at 12?

Koili (horrified): Oh no, 12 is the time when I regularly chat with my best friend.

Sewa: I thought you said we need to cut off chats?

Nikki: Never mind, we can watch the movie when her chat ends. So Koili, shall I say movie at bedtime: 4am?

Lali: That is not healthy you know, sleeping that late it is bad for your metabolism, you should keep regular hours.

Nikki: Yes, but what if your regular hours are late?

Lali (thrown off track for a while, but recovers soon): I need to research metabolism before I can answer that question!

Koili: Good idea, we all need to learn something new, so that we can at least gain some knowledge in our free time!

Rabina: Maybe some PHP or dot net or Java….

Lali: Sounds boring, why don’t we learn belly dance instead?

Sewa: Yay, let’s dance to banma phulyo phool!

Koili: Banma phulyo phool maya jeewanma….

Nikki: Nagarnu hai bhool….

Lali: Banma phulyo phool maya laudaima…

All: Hudaina hai….

Rabina: Girls, we HAVE to stop this and do something constructive. From tomorrow, we all get up in the morning and study for two hours.

Lali: Sounds great, I appoint myself inspector!

Koili: Can I just aim to get up early on the first day, please?

Lali: No you can’t, you are getting up at 6 am sharp, studying for two hours, and I am inspecting you.

Koili: Anything, anything, let’s just end the meeting now, it’s time for my face-book girl to go to work, and she has already been late twice.

Nikki: Thanks for reminding me, I need to pick up my Farmville turnips too.

Lali: Of course, as inspector I am giving you all time off for this task. Besides, I need to pet my online fluffy...

Meeting dispersed.

Article compiled from actual meeting minutes.

Thanks to all my "characters" who agreed to be featured in the article.

If you like the article, please vote on the poll on the top right side :)

Reactions:

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Please vote "koili" you can change your vote... vote koili

abinash said...

that was hilarious, i love it , the characters act sounds fun, reminds me the series "friends" , well done!!!!

Shaili said...

kripaya.....party nabadalinu hola

Lali lai jitaunu vayo vane ma tali bajaunchu hehehe

Roshani said...

Very realistic and relates to all except these characters also..hhehehhehe

Sulochan said...

Hey Sewa ... Give me a gun ... someone disliked it ... :P .. Great job... Banma fulyo ful... LoL!!!

sewa said...

thank u everyone.
i appreciate your feedback abinash, roshni and sulochan :)

Yug zee Tah said...

i loveee this.
i shud write one abt my frens too..
wonder if it will be this hilarious, though.

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